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09

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QW 091312 “Such people”

There are such people who’re always willing to be of use for people around them. There are such people who’re never hesitant to be of service whenever needed. Those people do things for nothing in return. They just do what they can do for others. It’s so wonderful that I’m surrounded by such people. It’s so uncertain that I’m one of such people.

In terms of English learning, I’ve been making myself busy, caring for my own learning, to be honest. As an English teacher, I’m always willing to share everything I know with the learners around me and never hesitant to be of service to them. There’s no doubt about it. As an English learner, though, I’m so focused on my learner-self that I’m greedy and voracious in learning from anything in sight and lose sight of other learners. My teacher-self remains silent when I’m being a learner getting at what she’d after. Or my learner-self makes my teacher-self null.

These days, however, there’s this conflict within me. Do I need to have two separate selves; the teacher-self and the learner-self? I thought it would make things easier to have two selves with regards to anything related to English learning and teaching, and I believe it has. This scheme doesn’t seem to be working any longer. As I want to be a teacher who always knows what she’d be doing, I quit talking about English learning in Japanese on my blog or any online venues a while ago. I’ll never know who reads my messages and who those people are. I thought I cannot say anything effective, meaningful, and trustworthy unless I know who I’m talking to. I still think so. These days, however, I often think that there could be things that I could do “otherwise”.

There are such people who’re always willing to be of use for people around them. There are such people who’re never hesitant to be of service whenever needed. Those people do things for nothing in return. I couldn’t be grateful more for such people making me aware of how small and trapped I’ve been.

(40 minutes / 352 words)

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Aya

Author:Aya
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